Tuesday, March 22, 2005
For the purposes of this post I have declared myself King of the World.
All Hail Me.
Now, my first proclamation:
ALL YOU WHITE GUYS, STOP SHAVING YOUR HEADS.
If you're not on chemo, you have no excuse. You look stupid. ESPECIALLY those of you who clearly are doing it because all the other guys are doing it. If you have a good head of hair, GROW IT. If you have the classic bald top hairy sides, I guess I can see why you might want to just shave it all off but the fact is you all look like a buncha Marine wannabes, neo-nazis or just plain dumb guys.
Only black guys like Isaac Hayes should be bald. Buddhist Monks should be bald.
White guys with two cars and a rider mower should not be bald. You don't look good, and you're not fooling anybody. (Had I been faced with the possibility of baldness I would have quickly gone for hair replacement. My head has an indentation on the top which would look really bizarre without hair on it.)
------
Okay, I'm not King anymore. I'm abdicating.
------
Whether you've ever heard of her or not, you need to go see pianist Carla Bley's website: www.wattxtrawatt.com
This may be the most entertaining personal website you'll ever see.
Even if you're not familiar with Carla's music (imagine John Coltrane, Charles Ives, Duke Ellington, Frank Zappa and Verdi colliding in a horrible train wreck, and you're getting there), her site is a riot. Actually it's a prison, and you're not allowed to riot...oh, just go there. (Click the submit button when asked; just hitting "return" doesn't work.)
------
The other night my wife Jan (as opposed to my wife Evelyn -- WTF??) and I were laying in bed playing remote roulette when we got to ESPN 2 and watched several episodes of a show called "Cheap Seats." It's essentially MST3K, but they heckle old sports programs. It's really funny! It's hosted by two guys I've never heard of but my wife and kids know who they are. I think they're brothers. Look and see when it's on and check it out yourself.
To show you how MUCH it's like MST3k, at one point in one show, the hosts need to roll back the tape of something THEY'VE just done. When they do, the silhouettes of Crow, Servo and Mike Nelson have a seat and poke fun at the hosts.
TT
All Hail Me.
Now, my first proclamation:
ALL YOU WHITE GUYS, STOP SHAVING YOUR HEADS.
If you're not on chemo, you have no excuse. You look stupid. ESPECIALLY those of you who clearly are doing it because all the other guys are doing it. If you have a good head of hair, GROW IT. If you have the classic bald top hairy sides, I guess I can see why you might want to just shave it all off but the fact is you all look like a buncha Marine wannabes, neo-nazis or just plain dumb guys.
Only black guys like Isaac Hayes should be bald. Buddhist Monks should be bald.
White guys with two cars and a rider mower should not be bald. You don't look good, and you're not fooling anybody. (Had I been faced with the possibility of baldness I would have quickly gone for hair replacement. My head has an indentation on the top which would look really bizarre without hair on it.)
------
Okay, I'm not King anymore. I'm abdicating.
------
Whether you've ever heard of her or not, you need to go see pianist Carla Bley's website: www.wattxtrawatt.com
This may be the most entertaining personal website you'll ever see.
Even if you're not familiar with Carla's music (imagine John Coltrane, Charles Ives, Duke Ellington, Frank Zappa and Verdi colliding in a horrible train wreck, and you're getting there), her site is a riot. Actually it's a prison, and you're not allowed to riot...oh, just go there. (Click the submit button when asked; just hitting "return" doesn't work.)
------
The other night my wife Jan (as opposed to my wife Evelyn -- WTF??) and I were laying in bed playing remote roulette when we got to ESPN 2 and watched several episodes of a show called "Cheap Seats." It's essentially MST3K, but they heckle old sports programs. It's really funny! It's hosted by two guys I've never heard of but my wife and kids know who they are. I think they're brothers. Look and see when it's on and check it out yourself.
To show you how MUCH it's like MST3k, at one point in one show, the hosts need to roll back the tape of something THEY'VE just done. When they do, the silhouettes of Crow, Servo and Mike Nelson have a seat and poke fun at the hosts.
TT
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